Sunday, August 10

The Beginning of the End

Mannn. Week 10. Insane. I had 5th graders, and I was pretty sure it was going to be my last cabin, so I wanted to just completely go all out. At first, it was a little rough. I had two very very very outgoing, bold leaders/self-starters who would talk nonstop and thought their way was so much better than the PC way... The other 4 were quiet and complacent and would have rather watched the grass grow. Somehow we managed to win Culture Shock... I think that helped. And then my senior counselor challenged us to come up with a new cheer every day to match the theme night. I'm a very competative person, so not accepting this challenge was not even an option. My girls loved coming up with a new cheer and it kept it fresh and they were so proud so they would cheer all day long. So we won the spirit stick on Monday night... and Tuesday night... and Thursday night... Every night we could possible win it. Hahaha I laughed so hard the third time... It was slightly ridiculous, actually. The spirit stick had it's own little bed in our cabin because it spent the night there so often.

This week was an awesome God week. I feel like I was able to look back over the past 5 weeks and see how God has been teaching me in the form of building blocks...
Week 6-- Joyful countenance
Week 7-- Being wise... What does it look like? A wise man uses few words...
Weeks 8 and 9-- What does it mean to find strength in quietness and confidence? Finding God in the still and quiet... Using the least force necessary and the fewest words needed. Watching my tone and body language.
Week 10 is where it all came together. I learned now inadequate I am how in my weakness, He is so strong. All week, I found myself saying things I wouldn't ever say, with a patience I never have and a tone I don't possess. My girls were either very disobedient or just oblivious that I really was serious when I told them to do stuff, so I should have gotten upset on more than one occasion. But I never did. I can honestly say that that was NOT me. When I was quiet, God spoke loud and clear. His love and patience and joy took over in a way I could have never been myself. I am not a patient person, or a loving person, or a joyful person. In fact, if I didn't have Jesus, I'm pretty sure I would be a reeeallly mean person. Time after time they would do something I would just be like "that's okay, just try to hurry," instead of being like "no, actually, I told you to do that 3 minutes ago and now we're going to be late so drop the brush and run."
On Tuesday, one of my girls had been sweeping for Pit N Palace, and had done a very thorough job, so she had a very large pile... I asked someone to help her with the dust pan and then went into the bathroom to help the girls getting ready for Club. I came back to see the two girls huddled around my trunk and the trash can with horrified faces. My trunk had been sitting open by the trash can. One of the girls looked at me and was like "Troggie... I'm so sorry, I just dumped the dirt into your trunk accidently..." Yeah, that's right, 2 cups worth of dirt in my trunk. But I didn't have to tell myself not to get upset. I was just like "Oh, that's ok, girl. Good job sweeping..." Uh yeah, I KNOW for a fact that that was not me speaking. I looked back on it yesterday as I was pulling out my dirt covered jeans and was like "how on earth did I not get upset over that?" It was so cool to see that when God spoke for me, the situtation was handled a lot better.
And then there was this other girl in my cabin. When a person is complacent or lackadaisical, I want to go crazy. This girl was both. I seriously think she would have been perfectly find sitting on her bed all week. I wanted to punch her in the face. On Tuesday night, during club, I stood there, knowing I should be praying for both her and me... I was like, "God, I can't love her. I CAN'T. She drives me absolutely crazy." And He was like, "I know you can't. But I'm going to use you to love her despite you. Just move out of the way and let me do that." This was really cool because the week before I had been praying that God would love despite me. This week He really did. After that night, I didn't struggle with wanting to punch her anymore. Her personality still bewildered me, but once I got over my selfishness, I was able to love her just like the others.

Next week I have Work Crew. Thank goodness, I am so tired.

1 comment:

Rachel said...

haley! you are almost done! hang in there :)
When we get to FINALLY hang out, we will do whatever you want to de-pine cove yourself. Chick flicks, crazy pictures, eisley blasting, name it